Grace, love, and humility (My take on the Derek Webb controversy, among other issues)

1 Corinthians 10:23-24  “All things are lawful, but not all things are helpful.  All things are lawful, but not all things build up.  Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor.”

Over the past few years, I have become more and more aware of a disturbing trend in certain evangelical circles.  Maybe it’s a result of postmodernism taking over our society, including our churches.  Maybe it’s a result of the huge emphasis placed on the individual that is so prevalent in our culture.  Whatever the root, there seems to be this trend for some evangelical leaders, and of course their fans then follow suit, to–in order to make what may very well be a valid point–push the lines as far as they can in order to achieve the greatest shock value among their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

There are church planters who choose a bar as the location for their congregation.  There are pastors who cuss during their sermons.  There are Christian leaders who make a big deal about the fact that they drink.  There are books poking fun at those congregations who still hold to the formalities of hymns played by piano and organ.  There are those who seem to go out of their way to loudly mock Christians who also happen to be white, middle-class Republicans.

I’m going to give the benefit of doubt here, and assume that in most cases, these people have embraced a valid issue, and are trying to make a point.  We should try to reach out to lost people, including those who frequent bars.  We should try to make our delivery of the Message be one that will reach the ears of those to whom we are speaking.  We should realize that we cannot judge others as sinning for merely drinking wine every now and again, since the Bible does not prohibit the drinking, merely the getting drunk.  We need to examine some of the newer songs that are out there, and embrace those that are theologically rich, and realize that adding a guitar is not wrong.  We should understand that we cannot blindly follow any one political party, but should examine each candidate on each issue, praying hard about our votes.  And we should try to encourage our brothers and sisters in Christ to understand these same points.

BUT  WE SHOULD MAKE OUR POINT IN A WAY THAT IS HONORING TO CHRIST!!!

It is true that Jesus Christ pushed boundaries when He walked this earth.  He did things and said things that shocked the religious leaders of the day.  He crossed the lines of what was acceptable by hanging out with women, visiting in the homes of outcasts, and refusing to honor pointless traditions.  Maybe these leaders today simply think that they’re acting in the way that Jesus acted.  But I think there is a big difference.  When Jesus was pushing boundaries, He was doing so as a smaller part of His whole purpose–breaking the chains of the Old Covenant, the Old Law and introducing the world to His New Covenant of love, His New Law of grace.  He was breaking sinful traditions and habits and rituals to introduce people to His perfect law of love.  The people that He, as a result, alienated were those who stubbornly refused to believe in Him.

However, those today who are using this “shock value” to make their point do not, obviously, have this bigger purpose behind it, and are alienating and offending those that Christ has said belong to their own family.   Some of them have claimed to be trying to make a point, to open the eyes of complacent Christians, to shake us out of our comfort zones, to encourage us not to hold onto tradition for tradition’s sake.  These are good things to encourage Christians to ponder and examine in their lives.  However, I think that the “shock value” methodology is not the best, and I’ll go on to say that I even think it points to a level of immaturity in he who is doing it.

In the New Testament, Paul, as quoted above, points out that all things are lawful, but not all things are helpful, nor do all things build up.  These leaders have a message burning in their hearts that they think the Christian world needs to hear, but they should not communicate it in a way that is going to be offensive to the ones they are trying to reach.  Their message may be true and may be one that the church desperately needs to hear, but their delivery is not helpful, is not building the church up.    When Mark Driscoll cusses in his sermons, or preaches extremely graphically on sex, his Seattle listeners, who are more liberal in thought and culture, may not be offended.  But the Bible Belt listeners are going to go up in arms, as evidenced by the motions at last month’s Southern Baptist Convention to ban his books from Lifeway.  When books like Blue Like Jazz lump all traditional congregations into the same outdated, old-fashioned, ineffective, unenlightened dead-faith group, they’ll have lots of postmodern-thinking fans, but they’re alienating their more conservative brothers and sisters in Christ.  A church that meets in a bar may seem no worse than Jesus eating with tax collectors to some, but it’s a stumbling block to those fellow Christians who believe it’s wrong to consume alcohol.

And that’s the issue.  Not whether the point is right or wrong, because, as I’ve already said, all these people have validity to their points.  But how are they communicating?  Are they exhibiting the grace, love, and humility that wants to cause offense to no man?  Are they doing as much as depends on them to live peaceably with others?  Are they being cautious to not be a stumbling block to other brothers and sisters?  Even if they think they’re right, and you’re weaker than them for being offended, Scripture is still clear:  keep the weaker brother in mind.  Restrain your own liberty for the sake of his conscience.  Yes, these leaders are at liberty to say certain words, to drink certain drinks, to vote certain ways, but it is their responsibility, according to Scripture, to place a restraint on that liberty for the sake of others who may not feel the same liberties.  In employing the shock methods, especially when combined with an attitude of glee that seems to be present in at least one case that I know of, they are definitely not seeking the good of their neighbor.

So what does this have to do with Derek Webb, a singer/songwriter who started out with Caedmon’s Call and went on to release several solo albums that got a little edgier one by one?  For several years now, my husband and I have been big fans of  his.  His first solo album, She Must and  Shall Go Free, immediately started a buzz because of some controversial lyrics, mainly in the song “Wedding Dress” where he compared the church to a harlot-bride, using more colorful language than I just did.  I was able to look over the shock value of this because, after all, there are places in Scripture that make the exact same comparison using the exact same language.  However, each album got slightly more controversial in theme if not in lyrics, and when he started including a lot of pacifism in his lyrics we started feeling a little more distanced.  He is in the process right now of releasing the most controversial album to date, one that his own record label would not even release.  The main problem seems to be with one song, both for the message seemingly implied in the song (that it’s more important to fight world poverty than to preach against homosexuality) and for a couple of words used in the song that are certainly offensive to most Christians.  My take on this is that which I’ve already described:  He has a valid point that we should not focus solely on one issue as Christians (like abortion or homosexuality) but that we should also be acting out our faith by helping the widows, orphans, and homeless.  However, he loses my respect as someone whose point I want to hear when he communicates in such an offensive way.  He becomes a stumbling block to me instead of an encourager to me, spurring me on to the good works he thinks I should be doing.  He has succeeded in alienating a large number of his own spiritual brothers and sisters.  Where Christ shows grace, love, and humility, he has shown anger, immaturity, arrogance and a love of self, simply by the way he chose to communicate.

Matthew 12:36 says, in the words of Christ, “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak.”  We should all use this as motivation to be very, very careful in the way we communicate to others, especially when it comes to issues of the kingdom.  We must seek to represent Christ with our words and communication.  Make your points, challenge others where their complacency needs challenging, but do so with grace, love, and humility.

Will I shine? (for those who are heroes in dark times)

Jesus never promised an easy road through life upon following Him.  In fact, He basically promised the opposite–that the way will be difficult and riddled with hardships.  Each of us, in following Christ, will go through experiences that are painful, difficult, life-altering.  In these experiences we have a choice:  how will we respond?  Kick and fight against it, whine and pity ourselves, scramble around breaking our necks to find a way out prematurely, stomp off in anger and tell God we’re not playing if He’s not going to play our way?  Or will we have the grace (God promises the grace, it’s up to us to employ it) to respond with a quiet, steadfast heart that is willing to submit to whatever cup our loving Father will pour for us, trusting Him to know what’s good for us even though in our limited perspective the situation seems very very bad?  Thankfully, we have so many models to look to, people who have gone through tragedy or hardship and come through shining quietly.  I think of people I’ve admired as I’ve heard their stories–Susanna Wesley;  Elizabeth Prentiss;  Joni Eareckson Tada; Alba, a humble, joyful woman in the rural mountains of Ecuador (the only one in this list that I’ve had the privilege of meeting); and of course, my great hero of the faith, Elisabeth Elliot–who lost not only Jim, her famous first husband, but also her second husband to cancer.  Each of these women–and there are many others, countless women everyday whose names and stories never become known–went through extremely difficult situations, tragic situations, and yet remained steadfast and quiet.  Lord, give me grace–as you allow pain and trials in my life–to follow in the footsteps of these women who followed you faithfully even when the way seemed dark, lonely, and too heavy to bear.

When I hear this song, I think of them:

“The Moon”–Kendall Payne

The moon’s worn thin, succombed to the pressure.  Her silver dress hangs in the sky like a rag.  Her coat, her cloak, her cover of darkness fails to hide the tears that she’s cried.  Oh, she cries.  But she still shines, though the night falls around her.  By her light, I find my way.  When I fear the path laid before me, I look to the light of her face and thank her for being so brave.

The moon remains in fullness or frailty.  A faithful climb, and I stand amazed at the way she still shines, though the night falls around her.  By her light, I find my way.  When I fear the path laid before me, I look to the light of her face and thank her for being so brave.

Choose life

Recently I was reading in Deuteronomy and came across the following Scripture:

“I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse.  Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice and holding fast to him, for he is your life and length of days, that you may dwell in the land that the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.”  Deuteronomy 30:19-20

I have read that passage many times before, but for some reason, this time it really stood out.  Most specifically, my mind stuck on the phrase, “that you and your offspring may live.”

I don’t adhere to covenant theology–the teaching that the children of believing parents are also part of the covenant and therefore will be saved by default (in my very limited understanding)–but I cannot argue the fact that the lives of the parents have an effect on the children.  As my kids are growing from babies to toddlers to preschoolers to “big kids” (and I just happen to have one of each!), it becomes more and more apparent to me that I am not living my life solely for myself.  My decisions impact others.  Whether I am diligent in housework or lay around all day.  Whether I am diligent to exercise and eat right or just remain sedentary and unhealthy.  Whether I am wise with finances or spend money carelessly.  What I watch on TV.  What I let my kids watch on TV.  The music I listen to.  The words I speak.  The tone I use when I speak.  Each one of these things is a decision that I make on one level for myself, but deeper than that, they have an impact on my children.  My children are watching me, whether I–or even they–realize it.  I am a model for them.  I’m not the only model they have, but I am one of the two most influential models that they have.

My walk with Christ, my pursuit of holiness, my battle against sin–do not involve just me and God.  The Scripture doesn’t say, as the old Geoff Moore (?) song says, “Choose life, that you may live.”  It says, “that you and your offspring may live.”  You’ve heard people say, “It’s not just about you.”  Well, it’s not.  I have four other little hearts for whom I’m choosing life.  I cannot save my children by living a holy life.  I cannot save them by teaching them and training them in righteousness.  God, in His abundant mercy, is the only One who can save them.  But I can definitely play a part in making the path between their sinful hearts and God’s infinite grace more clear by choosing life and modeling holiness for them.  It may not make them more likely to be saved, but it may make it easier for them to choose life every day once they are, since that’s what was modeled for them.

What an awesome responsibility!  My shoulders feel so heavy sometimes with the weight of the responsibility God has given me in each little baby that was placed in my arms.  Parents, your Christian life is not just about you!  You are the primary discipler of your children, whether you are actively doing anything about that or not.  That is your role.  That is my role for my kids (along with my husband, of course).  Yes, I will stand before God and answer for my own life, my own walk, my own decisions.  But I will also answer for the way my life impacted my kids.  Am I choosing life for them?  Am I clearing off the path to God for them, or am I placing obstacles in their way by the disconnect between what I preach and what I practice?

I know that these words were spoken specifically to the Israelites about the Promised Land, but I believe the application I’ve drawn is definitely valid.  Do I want my children to love the Lord, obey His voice, and hold fast to Him?  Absolutely–it’s my heart’s greatest desire.  Then I must choose life that not only I might live, but my children as well.

**One of my favorite singers speaks to this theme as well:

Sara Groves–”Generations”

“I can taste the fruit of Eve.  I’m aware of sickness, death, and disease.  The results of her choices were vast.  Eve was the first but she wasn’t the last.  If I were honest with myself, had I been standing at that tree, my mouth and my hands would be covered with fruit–things I shouldn’t know, things I shouldn’t see.  Remind of this with every decision, generations will reap what I sow.  I can pass on a curse or a blessing to those I will never know.

She taught us to fear the serpent; I’m learning to fear myself and all of the things I am capable of in my search for wisdom, acceptance, and wealth.  To say that the devil made me do it, is a cop-out and a lie.  The devil can’t make me do anything when I’m calling on Jesus Christ.  Remind me of this with every decision, generations will reap what I sow.  I can pass on a curse or a blessing to those I will never know.

To my great-great-great-granddaughter, live in peace.  To my great-great-great-grandson, live in peace.  Remind me of this with every decision, generations will reap what I sow.  I can pass on a curse or a blessing to those I will never know.”

Awesome song, awesome message.  Lord, help me choose life.

Resting

The past few weeks, since we got home from Somerset, have been particularly difficult. All of the roofing “stuff,” knowing that Clay was behind at work, lots of drama and uncertainty about the future of Clay’s job, and the ever present wondering if we’ll have as much money as month, all combined with being very very pregnant and somewhat emotionally unstable while chasing three small children. Last week for some reason it all just got to me pretty badly and I was allowing myself to despair. Finally, I was able to remind myself of the truth, that I cannot control most of those things, nor does God expect or want me to. I can’t help Clay get caught up on his route. I can’t bring in any income (although I am responsible to be wise in spending), I can’t control who gets fired from the commercial branch at Terminix, and I can’t make this baby come any sooner than it is going to. So getting myself all worked up and worried about these things was incredibly foolish. I’ve been in this place before, realizing the folly of worrying and resting in the Lord, only to, days or weeks later, be right back where I started. But God reminded me again this weekend that my responsibility right now is to care for my girls, husband, and home, and to do so with love and grace and patience. None of the other stuff is mine to control. I was letting my joy be robbed by things that may or may not happen. I was forfeiting the peace that is mine in Christ. I was longing for rest, but scorning the only true rest, the rest that I already have access to, the rest promised me in Matthew 11: 28-30, one of my favorite passages of Scripture. God was already showing me this, and then in church Sunday, as the pastor began a series on dealing with adversity, we sang the hymn “Jesus I am Resting Resting.” It’s been awhile since I’ve sung or heard this hymn, and I just worshipped as the words ministered to my soul like a healing balm. Maybe the lyrics will minister to you, too, as you find yourself caught up in cares that really should not be strangling you like they are. Let go of what isn’t yours to control, examine yourself to make sure that you are doing all you should, then find your rest in Christ.

Jesus, I am resting, resting,
In the joy of what Thou art;
I am finding out the greatness
Of Thy loving heart.
Thou hast bid me gaze upon Thee,
And Thy beauty fills my soul,
For by Thy transforming power,
Thou hast made me whole.

Refrain

Jesus, I am resting, resting,
In the joy of what Thou art;
I am finding out the greatness
Of Thy loving heart.

O, how great Thy loving kindness,
Vaster, broader than the sea!
O, how marvelous Thy goodness,
Lavished all on me!
Yes, I rest in Thee, Belovèd,
Know what wealth of grace is Thine,
Know Thy certainty of promise,
And have made it mine.

Refrain

Simply trusting Thee, Lord Jesus,
I behold Thee as Thou art,
And Thy love, so pure, so changeless,
Satisfies my heart;
Satisfies its deepest longings,
Meets, supplies its every need,
Compasseth me round with blessings:
Thine is love indeed!

Refrain

Ever lift Thy face upon me
As I work and wait for Thee;
Resting ’neath Thy smile, Lord Jesus,
Earth’s dark shadows flee.
Brightness of my Father’s glory,
Sunshine of my Father’s face,
Keep me ever trusting, resting,
Fill me with Thy grace.

Refrain

I asked the Lord

Lately the Lord has been fueling the desire in my heart to spend more time in His word, seeking Him out and knowing Him more, and hopefully becoming more like Him. As a result, I’ve been more sensitive to the ways that He’s working and has been working in my life. I’ve had a lot of seemingly unanswered prayers over the past few years. He has been good and has provided lovingly for us, but He has not seen fit to answer our prayers for, first a full-time ministry position, and lately for a better job for Clay. This process of asking, begging, for what seems like only a good thing, and not receiving, has at times been dangerous to my fragile faith and strength. I have felt despair and frustration, and at times even anger with God that He would not lift these burdens from our family, that He would not bring us to a place where we are living out the vocational calling that He Himself has placed upon us. Why would He not answer these prayers? It made no sense. But lately, my spirit has been calming down some. In the midst of the unanswered prayers, I had been neglecting to praise Him for the answered ones and the good things that He has been showering on us, some that I never even asked for. In my pity party, I was robbing myself of the fruit that could have been growing in me, for much fruit can grow under adverse circumstances. So now I’m trying to keep a quiet heart and let Him do what He wills in my heart through a situation that I would not have chosen. All that to say, yesterday morning we popped an Indelible Grace cd in on the way to church, and the following song really seemed to hit the spot of what my heart has been crying recently. I’m sure that most of you have experienced the same trial in your faith, of persistent unanswered prayers (or “no”-answered prayers), and you may have felt the despair that I have felt. May these lyrics minister to you, as well. The words were written by John Newton, and Indelible Grace has redone it on their Beams of Heaven album.

I Asked the Lord

I asked the Lord that I might grow in faith and love and every grace,

Might more of His salvation know and seek more earnestly His face.

‘Twas He who taught me thus to pray and He I trust has answered prayer,

But it has been in such a way as almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour at once He’d answer my request

And by His love’s constraining power subdue my sins and give me rest.

Instead of this He made me feel the hidden evils of my heart,

And let the angry powers of Hell assault my soul in every part.

Yea more with His own hand He seemed intent to aggravate my woe;

Crossed all the fair designs I schemed, cast out my feelings, laid me low.

“Lord, why is this,” I trembling cried. “Wilt Thou pursue thy worm to death?”

“Tis in this way,” The Lord replied, “I answer prayer for grace and faith.”

“These inward trials I employ, from self and pride to set thee free,

And break thy schemes of earthly joy, that thou mayest seek thy all in me.”

**May I not be guilty of refusing the very method God has chosen to make me more like Him.